A family member cares for me now and I live with them, and I am very happy with the waiver. I am also proud to say that I cost the state the least by being in Consumer directed care.  But, I am very fearful of being institutionalized because of EVV.  I understand that non-compliance with EVV will result in the offering of "other services".  I know that means institutions because there are no other options.  Institutions are mass care; I currently get one on one care with consumer directed.  The difference is like night and day.  I have been in many institutions.  The persons working there are there for income and not because they care.  There was no speaking up for myself.  One nurse once gave me a pill and said it was my health medication.  It was valium.  I could taste it was not my medication and spit it out.  She was trying to shut me up by making me drowsy or sleep.  I do not yell; I was calmly trying to state my case and they didn't want to hear it at all. Everyone in these institutions is hurried and the last thing on their minds is the people there.  They are too busy filling out forms and complying with regulations.  I tried to call 911 once and they stopped me from using the phone.  They spray scented air fresheners every where when inspectors or potential residents were coming and it gets hard to breathe due to the fog.  Once, they had a bad case of bedbugs in a building.  A pest control co. used heaters to heat up certain rooms to very hot temps and the paint peeled off the walls.  When people living there asked why they had bugs on them and large welts, no staff would tell them it was bed bugs.  There are people in these institutions that can be somewhat dangerous and, as a resident, you must be around them.  A man pooed in the elevator and it came down his pants onto the floor and I was in there with him when this happened.  Once, I found another person in my bed, and I couldn't wake them to get them out because they were one of the violent ones.  It took a while to get my bed back.  One person yelled at everyone, staff included, non stop.  One man resident in one institution offered to spank me and winked at me on a daily basis.  The food smelled bad in all the institutions and was unpleasant to eat.  Going past certain rooms smelled like strong urine.  Once, I saw poop that looked like maybe a large rat had left it in one of the basements.  I once roomed with someone who said the devil tells them to pull out their feeding tube and they pulled out their tube all hours and caused emergencies waking me up all hours.  One man would lunge at you like he was going to hit you when you walked by.  The carpeted flooring in many places had round stains everywhere.  I could go on and on with what I have seen.  There is no place like a real home.