I am a 36-year-old resident of Arlington, Virginia and I am commenting in opposition to the proposed model policies regarding the treatment of transgender students in Virginia public schools. I to moved Virginia 30 years ago and since then have gone back and forth between Fairfax and Arlington. I was educated in Virginia public schools from first grade at Mantua Elementary in Fairfax through my graduation from Washington-Liberty (formerly Washington-Lee) High School in Arlington. This continued after graduation as I earned my associates degree from Northern Virginia Community College in 2010 and my bachelors from George Mason University in 2012.

The 2021 Model Policies were a landmark achievement that sought to protect transgender students and ensure they were able to learn and function in as safe an environment as possible. The proposed updates to these guidelines are a regrettable 180 degree turn and seem to be more from a viewpoint that believes we need to protect our schools from transgender students and the perceived threats they pose rather than protecting the actual students.

One of the specific issues I found troubling in these guidelines was the how the term "transgender student" is defined (Page 5). Making the validity of a student's gender identity hinge on getting written requests/declarations about this from their parents is not just harmful, it's (for lack of a better word) idiotic. To use a somewhat esoteric analogy, if a student says they are a fan of Steely Dan, that sincerely held belief does not change if their parents/guardians disapprove of this. Now transfer that message to the much more intimate and personal issue of a student's identity and sense of self. If a parent "objects" to their child being transgender, this does nothing to change that said student still identifies as transgender. Using this definition, from the perspective of students, allows schools to reinforce the perspective that their very identity and sense of self is invalid and unwanted, which is completely antithetical to the idea of ensuring a safe environment for students to learn in.

But this leads to the larger issue I have with these guidelines. One of the most vital parts of the 2021 Model Policies was the understanding that students who identify as transgender may not have a supportive environment outside of school and that requiring parents to be notified of such issues (outside of imminent self-harm) can actually be detrimental to that student's well-being. Disregarding this section, which is withdrawn from the 2022 Model Policies, puts transgender students (who are already vulnerable on a number of levels in school) in even further potential danger. If a transgender student is seeking to be recognized by a gender identity that is different from their assigned-sex at birth, but has not informed their parents about this, there's a good chance it's because they specifically fear how their parents will react and what actions their parents will take in response to this. Some of theses actions include emotional/physical abuse from parents, being forced to partake in extreme religious practices, being forced to attend pseudo-counseling services that amount to nothing more than reparative (or "conversion") therapy and outright being disowned. All of those actions are fates that transgender students currently face across the globe from unaccepting and non-affirming parents/guardians.

In addition to that, how and when a young person comes out to their family about their sexual orientation or gender identity is an extremely personal decision and is one that usually requires a lot of thought and consideration. It's one of the few things that they can have actual control over. Forcibly outing these students to their parents robs them of that control and that agency. The decision of when to tell their parents/guardians should not be infringed upon by school employees or officials who have no understanding of a student's situation outside of school.

I could go on from here to discuss the statistics about the rates of depression and suicidality among transgender young people, but I'm sure many other commenters have already written such things. Instead, I'd like to close by talking about joy and happiness. For the students who will be most adversely affected by these policies, you are taking away a piece of joy from their lives. As I've stated earlier, if they are keeping their gender identity from their parents/guardians, it's probably because they believe (or know) that their parents will not react positively to this. Being able to be recognized by their identity most likely provides a sense of security and validation that they don't get elsewhere in their lives. Taking that away is terrible and when it's combined with the ridiculous level of work we expect from these students (especially high school students), it just feels cruel.

I implore these standards to be rejected and to please let the standards from the 2021 Model Policies remain in place. I say, with no hyperbole, that the lives of transgender students, both current and future, depend on this. Thank you.